Selamat Hari Raya 2011

Selamat Hari Raya Aidilfitri to all my Muslim friends!
have a great one, which coincides with Merdeka even!

everyone loves a loooong break! :)

And so we move on... again and again

its been about 12months+3 weeks since i came home, or 10 months+3 weeks working (i had 2 months to enjoy before i joined the workforce, and this final week of August is Hari Raya anyway so considered 11 months working..)

if there's one thing i miss before coming back, its my close girlfriends :( ..i would admit i was anxious about finding new close girlfriends, although i am kinda doubtful about making ur fellow colleague who u work with and see everyday as ur next-new-bestie.

its not easy to find close girl friends who really click with u and tune to the same frequency (yes, girls Are complicated in some ways) and i would disappoint myself wondering why i have yet to find them here at work... perhaps i forget that close girl friends take time to find, to build a trusting relationship, to be put to the test through ups and downs over years and years, not just weeks or months with an hour of shallow talk over lunch and occasionally movie nights.

yes, i did forget that i still have good times with colleagues all the same, with movie nights, dinner gatherings, weekend outings or just chit chats, brunch+lunch+tea time and gossiping at work...

Hari Pink Sedunia, breast cancer awareness day?
nope, its just a coincidence, and sweet one indeed..

purple-pink this time.. its kinda fun to notice the small things at work especially when work becomes daunting and monotonous sometimes.. even matching colours can brighten up my day..

change to turquoise this time, and yes, its really unplanned..
we even match the dental chairs..

this is just SOME of the snacks/food i devoured in the past couple of weeks (thanks to the Ramadan Bazaar), most not bought by myself, in fact the ayam penyet at the bottom left was given by a patient of mine.. had fun snacking endlessly, but not fun trying to fit into my clothes later..

i would miss all my dental staff (dental nurses, technicians, counter staff etc) as well, thanks for all their help, endless teasing, constant gossiping and nonstop snacking/minum pagi and petang etc.. in fact a staff here gave me a cute sponge bob cup (cause she say i look like that) before i leave my hospital attachment.. how sweet!

the way our dental training works is we are attached in the main city (Kuching) for 1 year (now changed to 2 years like housemanship) before we are posted to smaller districts in Sarawak to work for another 2 years at least..

since i reported work kinda late (October, thanks to being Overseas grad) compared to local grads who reported much earlier around Jun-August time, most of my colleagues leave before i do so its nonstop farewells after farewells after farewells for them in the past few months..

i used to think i don't have many close friends at work, its such a small community after all and people do get antisocial sometimes (i do too!) not everyone wanna see their colleagues at night or during weekends after 5days of 8-5pm..

yet when one by one leave,
in December 2010.. in January 2011..
in March.. in April..
in June.. in July..
and now in August.. i keep feeling the pinch..

first i'll hang out with a new female colleague, we'll chat, hang out together, starting to get close and then she leaves for district posting as her 1 year training has ended, while i am still in Kuching working..

..till i find another new female colleague to chat and hang out with.. and then she leaves too..

..and the cycles starts again. its happens every couple of months, its like taking turns to be close friends with individual female colleagues..

..am i just trying to find a close female companion to fill in the gap the previous one leaves behind?

female colleagues i have been hanging out with in the past year or so, all during different months of the year (its like different seasons of the year!) and ALL have left Kuching..

and then the brief couple-of-months-old friendships resumes in the world of Facebook, yes, we do exchanges our "I Miss hanging out with you! see you Soon! etc" and occasionally comment on status update changes, but its not the same anymore.

yes, i kinda hate monthly farewells. but i suppose these things happen, especially when we have only a year to work here and everyone starts working during different months of the year. its like Kuching is just a stepping stone or a transition period to meet fellow colleagues before everyone goes their separate ways to random parts of Sarawak, not a time to build close friendships.

maybe its my fault for having trying to be close in the first place, then for being difficult in bidding goodbyes and for taking much longer to move on after that.. and the silly part is i doubt any of them feel the same way! reminds me of my previous blog posts: To Be Concerned (which perhaps i shouldn't!) and resulted in To be Taken for Granted. Again...

during my last day at Hospital attachment, a few colleagues brought me to HK Causeway Bay, Jalan Song for farewell lunch

dim sums, baked rice and set lunches

3 pretty girls enjoying the Friday lunch

colleagues come and go and since most of them have left, these are some new faces now who recently started work in the past month to replace those who have left, and thus they have become my fresh new circle of friends..

yes, the cycle starts again, but only this time, I would be the one leaving soon within the next month. i think i've learnt that you should not don't get too close if you know you'll be apart soon..

or should you still?

Penang Again, 4th time in a Year! (Part 2)

alrights, Taiping Zoo done, next stop back in Penang Island, Ampangan Air Itam, above Kek Lok Si Temple.

Just driving pass to see the dam without getting down as it was drizzling.

then its time to go Penang Hill... the ride is about every half an hour and the train/cable car/funicular gets full fast, the last train from the top is 8pm weekdays and 9pm weekend. for Malaysians entrance is rm8, non citizens rm30, so don't forget your proof of citizenship.

posing with the train, its faster than i expected actually. Gotta like the train, get to go on top of Bukit Bendera/ Penang Hill without hiking (why doesn't the name translate accurately? shouldn't it be Flag Hill or Bukit Pulau Pinang?) unfortunately it was misty so can't get the view of the island

i was surprised to find this British Restaurant, David Brown's, on top of the hill. What's more the weather is cooling on top of the hill and everything is so Brit that it's like a quick trip back to UK! does bring back sweet memories... especially the weather, the setting, and it was promoting Devonshire Cream Tea and Scones (2)!

time for afternoon tea! too bad no scones, only serve before 6pm, perhaps next time. had crepe with vanilla ice cream and apple pie instead with Cameronian tea.

the view of the ride on the train when heading back down.. the tracks divide at some point so that the opposite train can wait for our train to pass.

Kayu Nasi Kandar with lots of TV screens at every cover of the restaurant

supper at kopitiam at Goodall with chicken chop, ikan panggang, 'helicopter' shellfish and pie tee. i had an impression pie tee is from Malacca (is it a nyonya kuih?) but of course, Penangites always claim anything on the island as theirs...

breakfast was at Joo Leong Cafe on the way to the airport, had half boiled eggs and butter on toast.. unfortunately the kaya, nasi lemak and noodles finish oredi, must be really popular for a shop to be packed but only sell eggs and toasts!

due to unavoidable circumstances, i was transiting at KLIA for 4 hours.. fortunately found a place called Cafe Barbera on the Departure floor that has scones (3) so had afternoon tea with scones and a magazine in the end.. and surprising the 4 hours passed pretty quick, in fact i had not finish the Cosmopolitan magazine yet!

definitely an enjoyable short and sweet escape from the work, especially the surprising afternoon tea in a British Restaurant in the cool autumn weather on the peak of the 833m Penang Hill. i doubt many locals could appreciate this part of the trip (isn't having char kueh tiaw at hawker stalls way more authentic, better and Cheaper???) perhaps only a very,very, very small minority of overseas-grad who are afternoon-tea-fanatics like myself would want to dine here. there might be more surprising common interests, but some words are better left unrepeated...

Penang Again, 4th time in a Year! (Part 1)

somehow the flights for Kuching - Penang is so infrequent its only one flight a day which is in the morning, so i did my own connection flight from Kuching to KLIA via Firefly and KLIA to Penang via AirAsia at night so i didn't have to take annual leave.

as we know, Firefly flies to KLIA whereas AirAsia goes via LCCT so you have self-connect.. fortunately its pretty reliable, in KLIA the directions to the bus station on Level 2 is easy and the bus is every 20minutes, the ride is about 20 minutes and it costs rm2.50. at LCCT the bus to KLIA is on the outer lane.

at my speed, the time i took once i got off Firefly and to the boarding gate at LCCT is roughly 45minutes, depending on how long you wait for the bus to depart. to be safe, give yourself at least 1.5hours to connect.

once i arrived Penang it was late and so its time for Supper with char kueh tiaw basah, reminds me abit of tomato mee but the gravy is definitely different. not bad though, the portion seems small since i can finish it in a jiffy, or maybe i was hungry. needed to recharge from the nearly-6hours-journey so that can sing my heart out till the wee hours of the morning!

Breakfast the next morning was a huge bowl of kari mee..

..before going on a trip to Taiping Zoo! it was my first time in the little town of Taiping.

entrance is rm12 for adults and i advise to ride in the free mini train.. only cause i am lazy to walk! lol

Sarawakian come so far to see orang utan? better i go Semenggoh Orang Utan Wildlife Rehab in Kuching.. luckily got a lot of other animals to see...

burung, babi, bull.. and buaya..
typical sight of Buaya, mouth open wide waiting to makan anything.. or anyone..

bear, buffalo, babi and bunta.. oops, i mean unta

actors from Planet of the Apes, actors from Water for Elephants and actors from.. Jumanji?

snacking with ice cream potong and waffles

its time for 5pm tea time and back in Penang, that's hawker food.. (in fact its hawker food for breakfast, brunch, lunch, tea, dinner, supper, late supper, etc.. ) had char kueh tiaw (dry this time) near Ayer Hitam Market, RM3.50 (at least didnt kena slaughter) but its not the Best kononnya..

next stop, Penang Hill!

Neither here or there

have you ever had one of those mornings when you wake up and realize the nagging trouble you've been pushing aside and avoiding is actually real, it's really there and won't fade away with time like you hope any other minor glitches would.

it's like one of those irritating itch.. when you have a good time or keep yourself busy to divert your attention, its nonexistent, yet when you are having some peace and mind, the evil itch starts tingling and refuses to leave, even during every waking hour of the day and into the sleepless hours of the night.

the tricky part is there's no win-win situation, its either this or that, either him or her, either us or them.. its like finding a bridge to connect both sides to meet in the middle to be fair, only to find the Atlantic ocean tearing both sides apart, impossible to ever see eye to eye even.

and you dunno where to go, you dunno what to say, you dunno which side you choose to please..

wait, that sounds wrong. choose to please? who's life am i living here, mine or theirs? why must decisions be made based on people's preference or plain convenience?

the burden gets heavier when everyone's happiness is at stake, awaiting on your decision. what to do, what to do, what to do. to rationalize the most logical answer? to be fair and just? or to follow your gut feeling? and to listen to your heart?

perhaps i need to pray, have faith and be confident there is a happy medium that all parties can accept. but right now i see the endless blue sea disappearing into the horizons.

alas, no use standing and watching helplessly as the waves splashes on my feet at my side of the beach. perhaps its time to start planning on how to cross this wide barrier as no results will futile from feeling lost and giving into circumstances out of convenience.

nothing earned, nothing gained.

even the construction of the longest bridge begins with the one brick. and i will find that first brick to keep me going. nothing is impossible if i don't try, and here begins the early steps of the journey of a thousand miles, armed only with strength, courage and God's grace.

Eating Kuching with Friends

that Saturday morning i had breakfast at Hak Guan, near 4 1/2 mile, its not easy to identify as from the outside it looks like a car yard. there's kueh chap, laksa, popiah, foochow food, kolo mee etc and the parking is always full

then it's lunch at tHe Spring food court (almost immediately! so full..)

the girls going for shopping after watching Rise of the Planet of the Apes at MBO.. its ok, if you don't mind believing there's such thing as smart apes.

then we went to Kuching Festival, the annual month-long festival which Kuching is proud of with lots of food stalls, stalls selling random stuff (electronic items like blenders, accessories, tyres, rice...), performances, mini fun fair and Garden show

bought some dragon whiskers sweets (its sticks to ur mouth like glue, so if you want to shut some chatterbox, give them this sweet) and durian pancakes.. nope, its not from the insanely-long-queue for the famous durian fritters. i don't have that much patience to buy durian fritters!

my dental nurse sells the penang assam laksa there so we had 4 bowls!

some of the random food with bought like noodles, soup, siobee, ice cream, mua chee, thai spring roll and durian pancakes

strolling at the Garden show and the stage performances

on Monday night it was a reunion with ex schoolmates at Porkie's BBQ Spare Ribs, Jalan Song, next to all the stalls at the back

mixed grill, ribs, lamb chop, chicken chop and potato wedges.. portion reasonable and everyone seem to enjoy the food, its just that sharing 4 meat dishes is kinda too 'meaty' for me

all smiles, and congratulations to two of my ex classmates who are tying the knot pretty soon! it was a pretty good night as we were updating each other about all our ex classmates. i hope there'll be more reunions soon with all my ex classmates!

To Be Concerned

i was chit chatting with Colleague 1 and we described each other in 3 words.

"helen.. friendly.. concerned.. etc.."

perhaps that was the result of my frequent 'How are You? How's your day? How was your weekend? Oo.. why? are you Ok? ..' greeting. maybe its something i picked up from UK. even a senior said i am better off as a counselor or a psychiatrist.

not long after, one of my Dental Assistant walked pass.. although he wasn't liked by most of the staff i still greeted him..

"hey, how's your eye infection?" i asked, knowing he has an eye infection for more than a week now. most of the staff teased him for spying or 'watching dirty stuff' or just avoid him for fear of being infected as well.

he stopped and answered "it's better now, i saw the doctor.. etc.. " and then he smiled and resumed his work.

few minutes later, he walked passed me again, nodded and said "doctor, thanks for your concern."

i was surprised to hear the word 'concern' twice in a day. i smiled. but the day did not end there. it isn't always rainbows and butterflies, as there are surely some who dislike me as well.

"well, i heard *** said you talk too much.. ask a lot.. kay poh (busybody).. " Colleague 2 told me in secrecy. obviously it stings, no one likes a negative criticism, but it's a way to learn from mistakes.

"are you ok? maybe i shouldn't have told you.."

i reevaluate the criticism and smiled again. "i am ok... well, i guess its how you see things, some call it friendly and concern, others call it talkative and kay poh.. however this is how i am, if i don't talk or greet people with questions, i am not me anymore. i won't change the way i am, i am confident for every 1 friend who thinks i am kay poh when i ask how he/she is, there's another 4 who appreciates the concern.."

perhaps i have to learn to pick and choose who to be friendly and concerned with, and who to minimize talking with to avoid being called a busybody or chatterbox. maybe its all a big misunderstanding, they could have misunderstood my sincere questions as being busybody, or i could have misunderstood that they would want to make conversation with me when they rather keep to themselves.

"hey, is ****** ok? she didn't come in to work yesterday and she didn't inform us in advance.." i asked Colleague 1.

"she's ok..." then Colleague 1 kept quiet for a while before continuing "helen, if i don't come in to work, would you ask the same question?"

"Of course! unless you told us in advance that you can't come to work.."

"i am happy that at least there is someone who cares if something happens.."

"well, we have to look out for each other right? we are colleagues..and friends.."

Colleague 1 smiled and nodded.

It got me pondering, if i was asking the same question to another colleague, he/she will probably think 'Why so busybody about why i didn't come to work yesterday? why need to ask around for everyone else to know..'

Its true, you do need to choose your friends who you want to be concerned about cause not everyone appreciates it..

Life's Not Fair

there are certain things that frustrates me cause i am not ruthless and heartless as it takes to 'survive' the rat race and make things to my advantage. i know the ways, i see people do it, i see them enjoy the fruit of their effortless shameless acts.

it comes to the point where it seems that the cunning ones are rewarded handsomely while the honest ones who takes the long route had to work more than double to get even a slice of attention.

so what are the tricks of the trade?

harrass, threaten, force your way in

seduce/blackmail the big boss

pull puppy eyes or sugar up everyone

or backstab/ sabotage colleagues

bribery, money, corruption, anything $$$

pull some cables (use connections with VVVIPs)

family ties or issues/marriage/ pregnancy

no, all these doesn't take as much effort compared to working decently like a fool donkey.. perhaps even enjoyable to certain people as these tricks of the trade are a challenge in its own way, maximizing their sweet tongue, their sexy appeal, their connections or wealth to get what they want..

i would think that its not worth stooping down so low till i see these unscrupulous people enjoying themselves, getting the money, the position, the place that they want, living life happily while the others who pride their dignity and honesty get the lousy mistreatment and rotten leftovers.

there's no point brewing any sense of envy or jealousy at such injustice. just pray, God knows what He's doing.. and there's a reason why things happen the way they did. these selfish people might be ahead of the game now, but no one knows what will happen many years down the line...

Medical/ Dental Community Service 7 at Kampung Rejoi, Bengoh

Last weekend a few of us went on another community service to Kampung Rejoi, about 3-4 hours hike from the Bengoh Dam, about an hours drive from Kuching... *huff puff!*

security check point along the way

starting point, thankfully the villagers helped us to carry tons of stuff like porters.. there's the Bengoh Dam nearby

trekking and hiking along the way

and the 'best' part, the long thin bamboo bridges.. there are about 5-6 long ones and nearly 10 short ones.. in the beginning it was scary but after a few bridges we were used to it, although standing in the middle of the bridge about 10meter above the river and the strong wind blows and the bridge sways wasn't very fun

random shots here and there, smiling and tired expressions

passing through Kampung Sait, which has a little shop with One table, thankfully! they are drying sheets of rubber under the sun so the place smells a little.. Kpg Pain Bujong is nearby too.. it took us 2hours or so to get here, so of course i wished this was our final destination as i was soaking oredi by then, but at least we aren't going to Kpg Semban (which is a tourist destination and a homestay i heard), which is way further.. 6 hours perhaps?

finally reached Rejoi after 4 hours! small village, and that tap was our Only source of water! sometimes there is insufficient water due to the dry spell that villagers had to go to the nearby river, well in these villages we would be lucky if we have a source of clean water...

us relaxing once we reached as we were the first of the group.. what do we do? watch the villagers set fire to the forest to clear the land for agriculture.. go to the nearby river.. watch the chicken run.. its like life's back to basics, especially when there's no phone line and no TV..

time to cook dinner!

any food is good food when you are back-to-basics mode with no luxury.. but surprisingly this village has a little shop too, the only problem is we went in the evening and had trouble making out what's for sale in the dark (no electricity here) i wonder how the shopkeeper can see his calculator when calculating..

villagers' evening activity, no Astro, no Angry Bird, just healthy activities

then it's time to start work around 9pm.. there's a generator to last a couple of hours so we could do our job, thankfully!

the dental team.. you can see my hair is still wet after 'mandi kerbau' (showering is more of washing away the sweat, you dont have the luxury to do the whole showering regimen) well, sleeping was on a mattress on the floor so that's not too bad, too tired to complain, and there weren't many mosquitoes coz its quite cold

local's favourite past time = dentists' worst enemy..
chewing pinang, sirih, kapor, tembakau etc.. they were teaching me how they roll up the leaves and the different combination.. and of course, i tried to tell them it's not good for your oral health! but alas, its a way-of-life..

hiking back.. we got lost and even ended up at Kampung Sait's primary school! kinda weird really to be hiking and hiking for hours aimlessly in the forest to suddenly stumble onto an empty primary school (its Sunday)

the 2nd time we got lost we ended up at Kampung Baru.. wow, that mistake cost us another hour of hiking at under the noon sun

finally reached back at Bengoh in one piece!

a group photo of everyone who survived the 4hours-each-way hike~

and a couple of days later, i saw the news of the village i went to in the papers! what coincidence.. it was about resettlement due to the Bengoh Dam project, and indeed the villagers told us their predicaments.. but there's just so much we can do...
except offer medical/dental care..